Friday, March 6, 2009

I thought I had a double life!!!

I get down on myself sometimes, thinking I live a double life! With immigration and stuff, sometimes I feel like I have to conceal who I really am. I'm so afraid of being judged, people actually caring about what I am that I forget that 95% of the time, people aren't even thinking about me. Anyway.
I found out yesterday that one of my "best friends" literally lives a lie. He lies about his last name, what he does for a living, even the people he "loves" and his RELIGION (of all things!) He lies about everything. Go figure! One of the people I thought I could trust the most turned out to be a pathological liar. I mean really?! Just how bad is my luck going to get? Do I even want to test it?
I'm done, I'm sorry. I know it's not good to give up this way but I just think people these days are ridiculous. You think you know someone and then somehow they get caught in a lie or they reveal something about themselves which leaves you dumbfounded.
I thought I knew you. And honestly, it hurts me so much. The person who I thought I could turn to when I can sleep at night- isn't the same person I just found out existed. Our entire friendship and the relationship that seemed to be developing is based on LIES! I could never look at him the same, I could never respect him the way I did 2 days ago. Everything is changed and he will never understand, he can't ever even know to what extent he's been busted. And the worst part is, when you're lying about things that serious, you don't see anything wrong with it. A liar will always be able to come up with a lie to justify their past lies. It's such a vicious cycle.

Really though, it makes me wonder. My sister and I go through so much and we're so candid and so open. So why can't people who (maybe) don't have it as bad be just as open? Why lie? How bad can your life possibly be that you have to fabricate an entirely separate persona.
I guess I shouldn't be blogging...After all, I do sign with an alias.



  1. Oh my!!! How'd you find out? Did he confess to you, or, did you had to discover all that without him?

    Sooooo busted...

  2. If he admitted it to me, he'd win half the battle. But I don't think he ever will. Therefore it's a lose-lose.

  3. I am sorry to read that.When I encounter this kind of people I run for the hills because after all I know I can never trust them.


"Hi, you've reached Blake, I'm not available to blog right now..." Jokes Leave me a comment though, and I will get back to you :)